Regular Jesus was a pussy.



He just needed to work out more. He never would have died on that cross if he had had the muscles to break offa there. I'm not saying he needed to use the cream and the clear or anything. I'm just saying that a few more hours in Ye Olde Roman Gym per week would have kept Our Savior in the fighting shape he needed to be in.
Our elite team of DeathCar Scientists, working 24 hours a day in a top secret underground bunker, have come up with the illustration shown here. The gentleman in question is known as Ripped Jesus. If you look closely you will see that Jesus is easily breaking not one but both of the crossbeams. The nails in his hands aren't even slowing him down. He thought that a fly bit him or something.
In short: I do not believe in Regular Jesus. He is not My Savior any more. I only pray to Ripped Jesus. And I invite you all to join me.

-Tach

1 comment:

  1. Pauly Shore18:35

    I like your body. I like the way it looks.

    ReplyDelete

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