The Answer, and I'm not talking about Allen motherfucking Iverson

Ok. So, I worked yesterday. I worked with someone who listens to the radio. I asked them my question about the song that defies all rational explanation as being a tolerable song, let alone the type of song that you hear twice in one day when you don't even listen to the radio. All I had to say, after describing the genre jumping shenanigans was "It was about the weekend, or partying or something". This individual then sang to me "Tonight's going to be the best night..." My jaw dropped immediately as I knew this to be the accoster of my ears. "YES! YES!" I exclaimed. "Who the fuck does that fucking horrid song?"

I am not really sure where to start....

Let's start with the fact that I wanted to figure out who had made this travesty so I could "hunt them down".

Fact: I own a Black Eyed Peas album. I will be destroying it shortly. I am not at my place right now, but when I am, it will be done. On earth as it is in heaven.I mean, sure it's their first album I own, you know, when they were making real music.

How's about the fact that the official video on youtube will not allow me to embed it... really? This video is so great, and the fact that it's a bunch of douchenozzle fucking Akon John Mayer wannabes sitting around dancing in their dressing rooms and couches that I shouldn't be able to share it with the DC community? Okay, maybe they were onto something.

Or maybe the fact when I was scouring for the song I didn't even click on any of the Black Eyed Peas links since I figured they were not capable of producing anything even close to this garbage, let alone this song itself.

I am really at a loss. I feel like a fucking dobber for ever having owned their music. If this isn't the definitions of selling out I don't know what is. And this is coming from someone who likes hip-hop, electronic (read techno/dance if it makes you feel better) and some throwback music. And an artist that I once respected managed to take all three, mix them, make musical vomit from the parts, and make a hit single.

Fucking kill me now.


  1. I am 98% Positive that Fergie is 10-15 years older than she pretends to be. Also, she was born with a penis.

  2. And Will.I.Am. is the worst stage name in the history of mankind. I hope he gets cancer.


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